Welcome to the World Ashley Marie

Well the day has finally come! We welcomed Ashley Marie to the world on January 18th 2012. We showed up at the hospital bright and early for my scheduled C-section. Waiting for us was both sets of grandparents with cameras flashing, it was as if we were on the red carpet and they were the Paparazzi. The first thing we did was deliver the books that we purchased in memory of Angel. We collected enough money to buy over 200 books to donate to the labor and delivery unit. The books were called "We Were Gonna Have a Baby, but We Had An Angel Instead". It was a great way to bring closure and meaning to Angel's life and help us start out Ashley's life.

We checked into Pre-op and gowned up. Paul was way too tall for his little outfit, but he managed to squeeze into just fine. I was a nervous wreck in the Operating room. They took me in there by myself to start the epidural. I was shaking and had a hard time trying not to be too emotional. The staff were all very nice and understanding. Once I was numbed up, Paul was brought in and Dr. Illeck started the surgery. I was pretty convinced that my legs kept falling off the table, Paul and the anesthesiologist kept reassuring me that they were in fact up on the table where they should be. It is such a weird feeling being completely numb but feeling the pressure of them manipulating my body and pulling the baby out. It was so uncomfortable and it took my breath away when they had to push her down from under my lungs. With a lot of effort, Ashley Marie was born weighing 7 pounds and 5 ounces. The anesthesiologist held up a mirror so I could see them taking her out of me. All I remember seeing was a white little thing and thinking to myself "OK it is really confirmed, she is a girl!" I don't know why I thought that. I never had any doubts that she was going to be a boy. It seemed like forever for them to bring her over to me. I instantly had a rush of happy hormones and I kept kissing her over and over again.

In the recovery room my arms were aching to hold her. Paul handed her to me and my heart melted. She was so beautiful. My first thought was she looked nothing like Allison, but looked an awful lot like Andrew when he was an infant. She immediately wanted to nurse and latched on right away. Once again my happy hormones were making me float on air, or maybe it was the dilaudid :)

We were able to have our "golden hour" with her. It is an hour of bonding uninterrupted time for just Paul and I. We investigated her little body, played with her little white fingers and explored her belly button and full head of hair. Paul asked the nurse if I was allowed to wear my jewelry now, she said yes, and he pulled out a wooden box with a diamond ring in it. I love that man! Not only was I holding the most perfect baby, but I was rewarded with a sparkly.

We fianlly made it to our room, not ocean view, but once again the happy hormones didn't let me get bothered by anything. It felt like an eternity until the kids and grandparents came up. Andrew and Allison were the first to enter the room. They were immediatly trying to climb up on the bed to meet their little sister. It was so precious and a moment I will never forget. The kisses seemed to never stop. The grandmas were crying and I was in heaven. Andrew and Allison of course wanted to hold her, which made me a little nervous, but they did just fine with a little help from daddy.

The grandparents all had a turn with her and they she was all mine again to cuddle and feed.

We spent 2 nights in the hospital. The first night, Paul stayed with me and my parents were at our house with the kids. The second night we had our first dinner as a family of 5. They gave us sparking cider and filet mignon. Paul took the kids back to the house and my mom stayed the night with me. We watched Grey's Anatomy and fell asleep for 5 hours! The nurse was really nice and kept checking in on us, but we were tired girls and didn't wake up at all.

We were discharged the next evening. Paul picked us up ina beautifully clean car and we picked up Enrique's on the way home. Happy hormones flying the whole time. I am truly blessed.

Ready, Set, Baby!

With only one week left, we are putting together the last few things for the arrival of Ashley Marie. Tonight Paul built Ashley's crib in our bedroom. I feel like I can't even remember putting Allison in this very crib when she was a baby. Wow it was just a few years ago, and now here we are rebuilding it for our second daughter, our third living child. I still can't believe Paul and I are parents, I still see us as the couple living in E building at CSULB. I used to dream about being a mom, and couldn't wait to be pregnant and hold a baby of my own. And now I am living in it, I am in it, fully submerged in my childhood dream. How lucky am I? As difficult as our last year has been with losing Angel, I believe that God has big plans for our Ashley Marie, why else would He go to such extremes to take away our son? She truly has purpose here on Earth, and Angel has purpose up in Heaven. I know he will always look over our family.

When I look at Andrew, I am so proud that he is my son. He melts my heart with how soft, gentle and loving he is. At such a young age he is already understanding others feelings and the importance of being kind, truly kind. He is an old soul, and loves so big. One of my favorite things he does is when Allison is upset or hurt, he runs into her room and gets her Tinker Bell doll and gives it to Allison to make her feel better. He genuinely cares about others feelings.

My little Allison, oh what a personality. She is the spark in this family. She keeps us laughing, and on our toes. I have never seen a kid fall so many times! She is energetic, fun-loving and oh so sweet! She wants to be a mommy so badly. She enjoys wrapping her baby dolls in blankets and feeding them bottles. To say she is independent is an understatement. She knows what she wants and that is all there is to it. She idolizes her brother and loves to play transformers with him. Her laughter fills up a room and her happiness is contagious.
With such fantastic children already, I am so excited to meet Ashley Marie and get to know who this little person is going to become. I already know that she has great purpose, and she is one lucky girl to be born into such an amazing family, and we too are very lucky to welcome her into our wonderful life.

A Family Bowling Night

We are trying to do fun things with the kids before we will be home-bound with a new born, so we decided at the last minute to take the kids bowling. We drove out to Chino Hills to the new bowling alley. It was really nice, big an packed full of people. We managed to get a lane right away, and right away Andrew found a new love. He LOVED bowling! It took him a little while to understand that he had to wait his turn, and not to throw another ball down the alley while his first ball was still slowly making its way towards he pins. He looked beyond adorable in his bowling shoes.

Allison on the other hand was strangely shy at first. She wanted nothing to do with the ball and refused to take her turn. It wasn't until Paul forced her to go with him, that she learned how much fun it was. She was crazy proud of herself after she threw her ball down the ramp, and would run back to us screaming with happiness, not even aware if her ball made it down to the pins.

Grandma and Papa Bug came to watch us, and we all decided that this needs to be an annual night out. Just a few more days and I will no longer look like I swallowed a bowling ball.

Princess Ballerina

Miss Allison Nichole has started a dance class. She is by far the cutest little girl in the whole class. She is so proud of herself and I must admit I am so proud of her too. It meets every Saturay for 45 minutes. On her first day of class, she sat there the whole time and didn't participate at all, but I was surprised that she even sat on the dance tape and listened to the teacher the entire time. After class I took her to buy a tutu and ballet shoes. Can I just say how excited I was to have my little girl all dressed up and looking so darn cute!! I can't take it, she is the most beautiful little girl in the world, and I must add she is the smartest girl as well. I love my daughter!

Andrew Transitions to his big boy bed!

We are playing musical beds in our house this week in preparation of the arrival of Miss. Ashley Marie. We purchased Allison a twin sized bed, and before that gets delivered, we decided to transition Andrew from his toddler bed to his big boy full size bed. Paul was not a huge fan of taking out the carpet but with some persuasion he agreed that now is as good time as any. So we started by disassembling his toddler bed, then took out the carpet then built the bed. Andrew and Allison were both great helpers during the 8 hour project. Andrew did a great job pulling nails out of the floor and Allison volunteered to bring sections of carpet into the trash can that was in the backyard.

Once everything was completed, Andrew was beyond excited to sleep in his bed. Getting up into the bed was a bit of a challenge. His bed is actually taller than mine and Paul's. And I am afraid that Allison's bed that is being delivered later this week is just as tall. We may have to put a step stool at the end of the bed so they can get up easily.

It was bitter sweet putting Andrew into his new bed, but he only had about 2 inches of room left in this toddler bed, so I knew it was coming, but when he asked me to completely shut his door tonight is what really made me sad. He normally likes to have his door open a little so he can have some light in his room when he goes to sleep. Tonight he grew up and decided it was OK to have his door closed...all the way. Baby steps Andrew, baby steps please :)